Friday F*ckery: Worms and bugs and bare feet and ... phobias??

Yeah, it's Saturday 🤷 I'm late.

Grounding … on like, the actual ground

Standing or laying on the ground is an excellent way to restore your nervous system. It’s called “Grounding.” It quiets your mind, helps you sleep, and lowers anxiety.

And if you’re like me, it can also bring up huge bouts of worm and bug phobias that you’ve been spending years trying to squish (pun not intended at first but then it grew on me).

As a little girl, I used to run barefoot all day. I used to make mud pies under a 100 year old Maple tree on my parent’s farm. I would even tip-toe through the chicken coop barefoot (grossssss) when no one was paying attention because shoes are just too much work when you’re eleven years old and you forgot to grab the eggs like your mom asked.

My sister and I used to run through the backyard when it rained, soaking in the energy of the weather in all its glory. Not once thinking about the bugs and worms under our feet.

Fast-forward to my mid-twenties, I’m standing in someone’s backyard. I’m looking out across their lawn and notice they have large lumps under their perfectly groomed, dark-green, lush grass. They said it was from clumps of earth worms under the grass.

In this moment, my entire life changed. All I could picture was me stepping on one of those clumps and squishing those bodies with my foot and them trying to escape my feet and some how *gag* touching me in the process … and I have to stop typing about it because I might vomit on my laptop and it’s only 6 months old.

Let me tell you. I haven’t been barefoot on grass since. On purpose anyway.

This has been an issue for me because I want to take up the practice of “Grounding.” Which means it’s time to smoosh this phobia back into a dark place (under the grass).

In my quest to rid myself of this anti-crawly attitude that has only grown worse over the years (I’m now in my early 40s) and in an effort to accept all creatures in nature, especially those in my backyard, I’ve been noticing them more, stopping to really look at them and appreciate them, and practicing gratitude for what they do for us. (Read: Life Changes When You Stop Killing Ants.)

I’ve also been standing barefoot in my backyard for as long as I can stand it. About 2 minutes if you’re wondering and if you’d like to laugh at my expense (it’s fine, do it). My goal is to work up to 5 minutes. My ultimate goal is to sit on the grass without a blanket.

Until then I’ll continue standing on the grass for as long as I can take it, will walk barefoot across my cement patio and let my toes look at the grass, and maybe even just lay some pothos vines and leaves across my body, from my house plants, while looking out at the grass.